Successful Negotiations Must Be Based On Mutual Trust & Respect

Having successfully negotiated many hundreds of contracts over more than the last three decades, I have often observed numerous negotiating techniques and philosophies. Perhaps the poorest model has always been the negotiator who overly exaggerates what he will deliver, and makes often outlandish demands of his adversary. While there are many reasons that behavior occurs, including lack of integrity, lack of expertise, character flaw, etc., the result is almost invariably an unsuccessful and unsatisfying negotiation. Successful professional negotiators understand and realize that negotiating using deceit may create initial positive results, but, over the course of the agreement, generally backfires. True negotiations professionals emphasize the development of a mutually beneficial relationship, based on trust, integrity, and solid business sense. Whether you are negotiating a contract for a group, event, business, or in a real estate transaction, it is essential that anyone representing someone else, in any type of relevant manner, must be a quality, prepared and effective negotiator. In selecting the real estate professional who will best serve your needs (and represent your interests), take the time to become cognizant of an individual's negotiating style, concept, abilities, and approaches (in other words, his true negotiating skills)!
 
1. Since I have also spent the same period of time training and consulting to well over a thousand leaders, I have observed how little attention most organizations spend to the negotiating process. The reality is that negotiations are the second most neglected detail omitted by most in leadership, but perhaps nothing so essentially impacts an organization as the skill and results of their negotiations. Organizations and corporations must realize that effective negotiating is an acquired skill, and that many individuals can never become good negotiators. It takes a certain mindset, which includes a commitment to doing lots of homework, and truly understanding both needs, and what to ask for, as well as what the other side needs. A professional negotiator always approaches the art of negotiations as a relationship skill, which only strives optimally when approached on a win- win perspective.

2. As both a licensed real estate professional, as well as a real estate investor and homeowner, as well as having worked in the financial services industry for years, I have come to the conclusion that negotiating is not an automatic or simple skill, but rather one that requires much training, knowledge, learning, judgment, and expertise.

 3. Why is mutual trust and respect so essential for negotiating successfully? Firstly, when both sides communicate honestly and above board, it saves an enormous amount of time, and lets the negotiations concentrate on the main or core issues, and priorities. No one will win if both sides cannot walk away from the process feeling they got a fair and reasonable deal. Unprofessional negotiators, who make absurd demands, either end up sabotaging the talks, or eventually, the side that feels it was deceived and treated unfairly, finds some way to settle the score. In addition, professional negotiators today already are armed with a large majority of the facts and data, because of the shared nature of negotiations, especially in certain industries, in today's technological world. For example, when one negotiates with a hotel, it is important to realize that hotels share information in terms of the historical data that actually occurred. When a negotiator, then, makes claims that are unsupportable by the facts as the data points out, his credibility is suspect, and the ability to get meaningful concessions and agreements is often destroyed.

Most organizations, unless they employ a truly professional negotiator in- house (which in most cases, only the largest organizations, even if they do, have), are better served by utilizing the skilled services of a professional. However, they should beware, that like in most things, all negotiators are not created equal!

The Importance of Setting Goals

One of the major reasons that individuals often do not achieve to their potential is that they fail to effectively set goals. Setting a goal gives one the opportunity to have "something to shoot for," and to focus on. There can be no true achievements if we do not set goals.

Whether this relates to a personal situation, or how a professional addresses real estate transactions or financial planning, setting goals is significant, important and essential. If a stockbroker does not clearly understand what his client wishes to achieve (his goals), how can he make viable, responsible investment suggestions? Similarly, whether you are a homeowner hoping to sell your home, or a buyer seeking your ideal home, unless you have a thorough discussion that centers around your realistic goals, based on priorities, needs, and reality, how can toy expect your Real Estate Professional, to do the best job for you?

When any organization, or individual, etc, starts a project, it needs to set goals, in order to measure if the project was a success. In order to set goals, one should do the following:

(1) Think about what is the purpose or aim of the project.
(2) Think of an Action Plan to complete the project (See one of my Ezine Articles, on action plans).
(3) Determine a financial budget.
(4) Forecast a manpower usage budget.
(5) Create a realistic timeline.
(6) Be realistic, but "aim high."
(7) Figure out what assets or characteristics you and others have that will be helpful in accomplishing the necessary action to achieve your goal.
(8) Create a "wish list."
(9) Draw a line down the middle of the page. On the left side, list anything that might be helpful in achieving your aim. On the right side, list the obstacles that you can conceive of.
(10) Next to the obstacles, create an action plan to overcome those obstacles and challenges.

Many people speak of goals as if the mere creation of goals will cause you to achieve them. In my over thirty years of consultative sales and marketing experience, I have discovered that the creation of goals is merely the first step in accomplishing anything. Goals give you a parameter, to then create and work an action plan. Just as the mere creation of goals does not automatically cause success, the creation of an action plan likewise does not guarantee success.

In order to have success, one must first set the goals, then determine the best course of action, and then, most importantly "work the action plan." Nothing will get done unless all these steps are effectively done in sequence.

There are always individuals who look for a simple way to do something, bypassing effective and comprehensive planning, or stalling and setting no goals. Weak individuals become weak "leaders," and weak leadership is no leadership at all. When someone doesn't follow through on a personal matter, it hurts only that individual. When someone gets involved in an organization, and assumes a leadership position, lack of proper planning, organization and goal setting, is potentially disastrous. Goal setting is extremely important, but for one to achieve one's goals, action is necessary!

Economic News - The Hype versus The Reality

No wonder most people don't understand the economy. Often what might seem good on one hand, has bad side effects on the other. For example, the stock market rises- one would think that was good! But that was mostly due to the rising price of oil- bad news. But, often the price of oil rises because the "experts" believe the economy is improving and thus more oil will be needed in production- good news! But that rise in oil prices causes the cost of living to increase- bad news. But that helps the Gross Domestic Product (GDP)- good news! But that then causes inflation- bad news. But that inflation means the economy is improving- good news! But then the Fed becomes concerned about inflation and raises interest rates- bad news! Which causes the value of the dollar to improve- good news! But that hurts exports because now American products cost more overseas- bad news! But that means foreign products cost less in the US- good news! But that hurts American companies competitiveness- bad news!

In real estate, home prices going up might be good for a seller, but only if he isn't also buying something else at the same time. How might higher prices impact the number of potential buyers? Lower interest rates generally mean lower mortgage rates, but it also generally means the economy is still running on all cylinders! Too many houses on the market; too few; buyers market; sellers market; or what? Beware of anyone who makes anything seem iron - clad!
 
If we think that political analysis and political chatter is often more hype than anything else, the same can certainly be said about analyzing economic news! You can readily see why economic news often seems co confusing. Economic news often seems confusing because it is - - what is good for one consumer, might be bad for another- what is good for one company, bad for another- what might be good for one sector of economy- bad for others.

The stock market is often the most confusing. On days when there is "bad news," the market often goes up, while on some "good news" days, the market sometimes goes down! While the Dow, or the S&P, etc., might go up, it does not mean that the stock(s) you own, will follow suit.
Too often, for the sake of a sound-byte, the media tries to over-simplify economic news. Yet the economy is by definition quite complex. The one issue there should be some agreement on is that high unemployment is not good. Yet even in that case, the "experts" can't agree upon, nor act upon a viable solution. Always ask, What caused that drop or rise, and is it sustainable, an adjustment/ trend; or merely over - reaction or a passing fancy?
 
The best way to think about the economy is this-- the difference between a recession and a depression is that it's a recession when it happens to someone else-- it's a depression when it happens to you!

It is my belief that a healthy economy requires certain factors to be in place - - low joblessness; high consumer confidence; a strong manufacturing sector; and reduced government deficits. That is what we must demand! This is not about mere rhetoric or side issues, but what actually is being planned, the reasoning, and the possible impacts and/ or ramifications!

Why Do You Use That Elevator Speech?

Far too few of us take to heart the adage that we only get one chance to make a first impression! Think about your reactions to those that you come into contact with, and why you come away with a specific first impression, or gut feeling about an individual. What specifically either impresses you, or turns you off, how important is body language, etc., and what aspects either make you feel comfortable and at ease, or on the contrary, make you leary and ill at ease. We often get only a very short interval when we first meet someone to both get to know someone else, and to create a scenario where he wants to get to know us better. Therefore, each of us need to feel comfortable with what is commonly referred to as either our elevator speech or cocktail party pitch. This refers to that short period where we first meet someone where we get an opportunity to begin the bonding experience, and create that positive first impression. In fact, while we refer to this as either a speech, or a pitch, it should appear to be neither of those, but rather must emphasize listening rather than speaking. These brief opportunities must address these factors, including: 1. Does it motivate?; 2. Why should someone remember you and consider doing business with you?; 3. Do you listen first, empathize, and wait to be asked about yourself before you begin to speak about yourself?; and, 4. Do you, in about 45 seconds or less, motivate others, explain the answer to the "Why you?" question, differentiate yourself, create an emotional connectional, and leave then whetting their appetite and wanting to hear and know more about you?

Why should this concept of an elevator speech matter to those who are not involved in what they consider to be "sales"? One is, of course, that everyone either sells themselves, a product or a service. The other key reason is, that if you want to decide what real estate or financial professional, for example, to utilize, you need to listen carefully to see who can "sell you" on them, in just a few, brief moments, because if they can't gain your attention, how will they be able to impactfully represent you?
 
1. Why should anyone be attracted to you if you are not a motivating type of individual? Have you ever spoken to someone that you think of as "Milk Toast," and felt like you couldn't wait for the conversation to end? How will your elevator speech motivate others to want to hear and know more?

2. What makes you different or unique? What makes you memorable? Does your body language make you appear welcoming, do you maintain eye contact, and do you truly listen?

3. Although we have two ears and only one mouth, most people fail to spend at least twice as much time listening as speaking! It is important to remember that most people's favorite topic of conversation is themselves, and they will rarely get bored or tired of talking about themselves. Therefore, you must first listen carefully and effectively, must empathize (rather than simply showing sympathy), and wait patiently to say anything about yourself until the other party asks. In the vast majority of cases, when you follow this procedure, people will politely ask you about yourself. When that opportunity occurs, you must avoid cliches or stumbling, but rather be prepared with an effective and compelling elevator speech.

4. You only have about 45 seconds or less to either draw someone in and make them care, thus whetting their appetite, or losing their interest. This elevator speech must avoid being too technical or involved, while at the same time avoiding cliches and saying what everyone else says. It often is best to get right to the point, joke about what "everyone else" in your industry will say, and then get right to the point about how you are different (and hopefully better). This requires the combination of attitude, aptitude and self - confidence, as well as planning and preparation.

The quality of your elevator speech is often the difference in the level of your results. A good one will propel you upward and forward, while an unimpressive one often retards your growth and potential!

6 Reasons We Interrupt Others, & Why We Should Avoid Doing So?

Although nearly everyone realizes that it is rude, impolite, inconsiderate, and generally counter - productive to interrupt someone else, most of us find it extremely challenging and difficult to avoid this urge or tendency. When we fail to let someone else complete his thought, idea, concept, or perspective, our actions are generally interpreted by that individual as being thoughtless, uncaring and insulting, even if that is not out intent. Think about it - how does it make you feel when you are the one that is being interrupted? Although this concept is compelling and essential for each of us, those in service industries/ positions, such as Real Estate agents, and financial advisers, must pay even more attention to avoiding this often - offensive behavior, etc.  Each of us should strive to attempt to avoid this tendency, and perhaps by considering these six reasons that we behave and proceed in this manner, might assist us in overcoming that temptation or behavior.

1. Narcissistic/ self - absorbed: Have you also observed that we appear to be living in an increasingly narcissistic society? While the mindset of it's all about me, might, at times, serve ones personal interests and focus, it often creates a scenario where we become unwilling to pay attention to the needs and perspectives of others. This factor aligns with the tendency of many to adopt as their favorite sound both their own voice/ opinion, as well as hearing their name.

2. Bored/ disinterested: The reality is often that we just don't really care what is being said or talked about, and we are hoping to end that discussion or change its direction. One can't impactfully fake that he cares when he is bored, so perhaps there is a need to address becoming somewhat more calm and patient.

3. Lack effective listening skills: Learning more about what others think and becoming more open to viewpoints and opinions (other than your own) takes a degree of discipline, training and learning. Each of us need to discover why we possess two ears and only one mouth.

4. Rude: Either we don't realize, or we just don't care, that when we interrupt someone else, we are treating that individual rudely and being inconsiderate. Perhaps the best way to overcome this is to adopt the essential philosophy that I refer to as ZTL (zip the lip).

5. Don't realize we're doing it/ habit: Perhaps because we have behaved in a certain manner (interrupting) for so long, it becomes simply a bad habit!

6. Lack of training/ learning/ understanding: Nearly anything worthwhile that we do requires learning and discipline. Since the tendency to interrupt others might often be the easy way, then unless we focus upon the reasons why we should approach things in a different manner, we end of falling into worse habits.

While these six are merely some of the reasons, they indicate why we should try to avoid the tendency to interrupt. Are you ready, able and willing to do so?

What Ever Happened To Customer Service?

In the "old days," when many stores in numerous industries were what we would consider "mom and pop" stores, whenever you entered the store, you were greeted by your name, and often you would enjoy some personal time conversing with the owner. In today's world of few small stores and many large stores, much of that personal touch is ignored, and there seems to have been a departure from the concept of serving the customer and his needs. Even in so - called personal service industries, such as medicine, real estate, and financial service, we often witness little attention to enhancing the personal service, and creating the most valuable service and experience to customers and clients. Too much attention to technology and the digital revolution (including Social Media, texting, email, websites, etc.), and not enough to enhancing the interpersonal relationship, are some of the most apparent reasons. Those in these professions should beware of lumping everyone into one group, and keeping their eye/ focus, on the needs, concerns, etc., of those you serve! Otherwise, why are you even needed?
 
In my town, there are a number of cleaners, some large and some much smaller. While the larger ones are often lower priced and have faster turnaround time, I still prefer using a small "Chinese Laundry" that has been in this area since 1947. Every time you go in, they know who you are and they chit-chat just enough (Enough to be friendly and welcoming while not so much as to waste your time). As you enter, even before you hand in your Claim ticket, they are already retrieving your cleaning, and pay particular attention to detail. While I would be very hesitant to bring some of my better custom made shirts to the other cleaners, I don't hesitate to bring my shirts here. They combine superior customer service with quality. This cleaner has been sold, but the new owners have wisely encouraged the former owners, to help with the transition, and while modernizing certain aspects, have maintained this small business feeling!

When I go into my favorite cell phone store in town, they fully understand and cater to my needs. They are patient when I don't understand something or one of my kids invariably lose or destroy their phone. They never try to "nickel and dime" me to death, and I never hesitate to refer others to them. Contrast that with the cell phone store nightmare stories that I have heard from others where someone tells me about the great "deal" they were offered, only to vehemently complain shortly thereafter when the inevitable complication or problem occurs. I know that my store, which has been in business far longer than most in its industry, does more business, more repeat business, and is more successful than most of the others. Their commitment to their customers is what sets them out from the rest. This is probably the reason that my store has been in that business so many more years than their competition!

Many of us have heard auto mechanic horror stories, how someone was either lied to, overcharged, charged for something that wasn't needed or done, or given shoddy service. Again, in my town, I have been fortunate enough to have found an honest mechanic who stands behind his work, and goes the extra mile for his customers. While my mechanic may or may not always be the least expensive, to me having the peace of mind and honest service is far more important than shopping around simply for price. Why aren't there more like these?

All of us have gone into stores, offices, department stores, warehouse stores, etc., where we are either unable to find any assistance, or the assistance is rude, pushy or otherwise unpleasant. Smart stores, regardless of their size, understand the importance of customer service, yet few make it the priority it is. Just think about that the next time you are placed on hold with a recording that tells you to type in your account number, etc., only to be asked all that same information once you are "lucky" enough to get a live person on the other end of the line.

How Well Do You Manage TIME?

When one examines what often differentiates the most successful individuals from most of the others, we often observe that one of the key factors is how well they manage their TIME. Even the most intelligent, most experienced individuals with the greatest expertise, often fail to achieve to their potential when they don't manage this essential component to its maximum degree. When each of us face major decisions and need the assistance of professionals, such as in real estate transactions (buying or selling), or in financial decisions, or, in fact, in making any larger, significant decision that involves either buying or selling, time management is an essential consideration. None of us likes to have our time wasted, and only timely action, generally achieves optimal results! Lee Iacocca stated, "The ability to concentrate and to use your time well is everything." While it may not truly be everything (because that assumes it is the only factor), it is certainly no doubt something that makes a key and major ingredient. Examining this from a mnemonic perspective perhaps helps us to best focus on what is needed.

1. Time management begins with a willingness and ability to train yourself. This is a far different scenario than merely taking training programs, classes, seminars, or even actual learning. It is, rather, the combination of gathering the needed facts, data, and information, and then synergistically using this information in a manner that best suits your personality, learning type and habits, desires, motivations, visions, goals, etc. This training is the ultimate form of personal development and self - discipline, because it is what will direct one to achieve to his maximum potential.

2. Far too often, individuals examine situations, and observe numerous areas that they realize need to be addressed, or need to be improved upon. However, those that merely follow a multi - faceted approach, rather than creating priorities, often get bogged down in minutia. Therefore, it is important for each of us to install personal controls, that help us to focus, prioritize, and organize as well as we can do.

3. A large percentage of individuals never even begin, but many others also merely begin but never proceed to a course of action that is essential. In order to best address how we might utilize our time, we each must maintain the course, so your plan has the opportunity to succeed. This does not mean merely never giving up, but rather developing a way to evaluate your progress, what needs tweaking, and the most efficient and effective way to proceed.

4. Perhaps the most overlooked aspect of this necessary task is how we actually examine and proceed with our goals, etc. Therefore, how we establish our short - term, intermediate and longer term plans and goals, will often determine our ability to succeed. Doing this creates a mindset for being organized, and unless one becomes efficient, focused and creative, how can he possibly best manage his time?

One can never consider how he handles his time, without examining priorities, goals, and especially personal discipline. Those who create a form of personal daily agenda, and utilize timelines and other measures/ metrics, are best able to use their time effectively, Remember the adage that both the most successful and the least successful individual both have the same 24 hours in their day, but the more successful use that time more effectively and, with the maximum positive impact! 

Difficult Is NOT Impossible!!

Quite often, many things in life may be difficult. However, the real measure of whether someone will succeed or fail is how he handles adversity and difficulty, and how his attitude gets him to act. Many people merely give up when faced with adversity, and use the difficulty as some sort of "crutch," by convincing themselves that it is so difficult that any type of modification or change would be impossible. Potential clients and customers of real estate and financial professionals should examine the individual they select to serve them, based on many factors, but one of the most important is whether the individual can remain calm and cool, and seek solutions, or use challenges as excuses for failure! Beware of anyone who seems to overuse the word, "Problem"!
 
Individuals with this type of defeatist attitude are often little more than their own worst enemies. The reality is that if one gives up, there is rarely any true chance of succeeding. For example, in sports, almost anyone will slump at one time or another. However, the athlete that accepts his slump as a trend that cannot be corrected, permits the slump to become his regular behavior, and his athletic career often takes an irreversible downward permanent turn. This athlete permits a negative attitude to pervade his personality and behavior, and often loses the self- confidence necessary to be successful in his sport. On the other hand, the athlete who accepts his slump as a temporary anomaly, and understands the statistics of sports, does not permit slumps to mar his self- confidence. Instead, this type of athlete flourishes because his attitude is that every failure brings him closest to a victory, etc.

The importance of not permitting adversity to defeat one is even more evident in business and organizational leadership. A strong leader sees adversity as a message that better planning and implementation is needed, and in the case of a "slump" period in an organization (that is, a period when the organization has encountered less than stellar results in membership retention and growth, as well as in revenue), realizes that it is necessary to begin to "think outside the box" to evolve the organization as a more relevant, action- orientated organization. As with the athlete who permits difficulties to destroy his career, leaders of organizations who permit obstacles to cause a pervasive form of negativity and defeatism into the organization, can also cause irreversible damage to the sustainability of the organization itself.

I have often written and lectured about a condition I refer to as "stinkin' thinkin.'" This is really all about the phenomena of the dangers of negative thinking. As life is not static, but rather evolving, it is important to handle obstacles and difficulties properly and productivity. Every adversity has the potential of teaching someone something that can be an important lesson for the rest of one's life. Difficulties can either be problems or challenges. The individual that sees and treats difficulties as challenges becomes stronger, while the individual who sees these difficulties as problems that cannot be overcome or handled, becomes defeated by the difficulties, and gets little accomplished. Which individual would you rather know? Which type would you want to lead your organization? Which would you want to represent you in a negotiation (e.g. real estate)? Which type of individual are you?

The Basics of Closing Any Sale!

Whether one is in business for himself or works for someone else, or whether someone works for a business or a non profit organization, or whether one is a laborer or works in a profession, everyone sells. We either sell a product, a service, or ourselves. Many individuals like to visualize that they are "above selling," and that they simply perform a valuable service. However, the reality is that regardless of what one does, chances are someone else does either the same thing, something similar, or some other alternative. Therefore, after more than three decades of training people from all walks in life about the basics of salesmanship, I am completely convinced that everyone needs to understand the basics of selling.

Many years ago when I worked in the financial services, the top representative had a sign and a cartoon hanging above his desk in his office that read, "Selling is like shaving. If you don't do it every day, you're a bum." Obviously, an individual selling investments and being paid on commission fully understands the importance of "closing" a sale. Yet, it is my assertion, that we should all learn from this example. I have observed many individuals who could give great presentations, but rarely got the exceptional results that one might anticipate based on the presentation. The basic reason was generally that they did not ask for the sale.

You may be thinking that this doesn't relate to you, because you don't sell! Well, you do! Whether it involves a personal situation, or a work - related one, how you proceed dramatically impacts your life. For example, everyone thinks of the real estate or financial professional as the salesperson, but, you, as either customer or client, must sell that individual on what's important to you, and determine, for yourself, which individual best serves your essential needs and priorities. It is significant and important to realize that the entire process must begin with a commitment to absolute integrity, in every aspect of your life and activities!
 
If one merely presents an idea, without ending with a call to action, there is very little chance that there will be any decision made by the individual being presented to. Human nature is that most people will not volunteer making a decision, unless a decision is actually requested. That means that after a sales presentation, someone must end by saying something like, "In light of what I just said, doesn't it make sense to..?"

While it is fairly obvious how this relates to the actual formal selling of a product, many overlook how this equally relevant in other situations. For example, if a dentist feels that a particular treatment plan is in the best interests of a patient, and that one particular treatment is superior to other alternatives, if all he does is present it, chances are that the patient will not fully appreciate the sentiments. However, on the other hand, if this practitioner then says, for example, "I have presented the various alternative treatment plans. Do you understand them?" It is essential at this point that the dentist wait and say nothing further until he gets a positive response, indicating understanding by the patient, as well as assuring that the patient is actually both listening and paying attention. Once he gets that positive response, the dentist might proceed as follows, "While there are various possible ways to approach this issue, I strongly feel that Alternative A is the best for you because.. " After explaining why, the dentist, should continue, "In light of this, doesn't it make sense for us to begin this treatment? Doesn't it?" Again, the dentist must wait for a response. Once there is an affirmative response, there should be a discussion of fees, payment plan alternatives, and then scheduling both appointments and agreeing to which plan the patient decides upon. Please understand that this is the optimal selling situation because the seller (the dentist) is "selling" what is in the patient's best interest, and bringing forth action by the patient. This is known as "win-win" sales.

Every situation, be it in business, or when a leader of an organization feels strongly about a course of action, the presenter (seller) must motivate the listener to important action. Please understand that there will be no action without "closing" the sale- that is, asking for a specific action, and waiting for and receiving definite agreement. Just as there are specific steps in giving the presentation, there are specific steps in closing the sale. Without the "close" being performed adequately and thoroughly, there will rarely be a "sale." Thinking of selling and sales as a compelling call to action.

When Life Hands Out Lemons, Wise Men Make Lemonade!

We all experience periods of bad times as well as periods of good. Individuals who adapt to misfortunes by learning from these experiences, and somehow benefiting, are generally both the happiest and the most successful. The adage, "Life is not a bowl of cherries" tells us that not everything will always work out the way we hope, or even anticipate, and to understand that limitation in order to best adapt to circumstances. Understand that there are always tests along one's way, and it's how we handle these, that generally determines our end - result! Ask any real estate professional if everything always proceeds as smoothly as one would hope, even when the finest planning is performed. Those that remain flexible enough to adapt to changing circumstances or conditions, keep the procedure grounded and their client's experience a far less stressful one.
 
Many people seem to enjoy complaining that life is unfair, and hasn't dealt them a fair hand. Realistically, life doesn't "deal," it simply offers us opportunities to either take advantage of, do nothing, or use poorly. There is never any guarantee in anything we do, but our "odds" of succeeding are distinctly enhanced when we take advantage of possibilities, improve our abilities, and upgrade our skill-set, rather than say, "I can't do that." Many individuals seem to prefer making excuses than taking the necessary actions to enhance skills that might be lacking (or need upgrading).

Obviously, not everyone can do writing or mathematics easily. All too many of those individuals, either due to frustration, inadequate training or education, or a "mental block," simply give up, and stop attempting to write or use mathematics, unless absolutely necessary. Others recognize their limitations, and use the opportunities offered to enhance their training, learn other skills, take training, or discipline themselves, and do to this added commitment, become "above par" in these areas.

A great example of using ones limitations, and "making lemonade when life deals you lemons," is how one might adapt to difficulty "keyboarding." Unfortunately, many, if not most individuals, handle this "obstacle" by using "avoidance techniques," and by avoiding using the keyboard, often neglect necessary tasks and duties, such as doing school or work assignments, as well as enjoying activities that comfort with using the keyboard would afford them. The individual who wants to "make lemonade," on the other hand, would find an alternative way of handling this circumstance. One such alternative might be installing and using "voice recognition software, such as Dragon 10, Siri, etc.  In that way, the obstacle of the use of the keyboard, whether due to a physical reason, a lack of patience, or some other disruptive "force," can not only be as productive as someone comfortable with the keyboard, but in many ways even more productive. This program permits one to use e-mail, word processing, PowerPoint, spreadsheets, etc., via the use of voice commands, instead of keyboards. The programs are easy to install, and easy to use, yet, of course require the individual to become familiar with the many features to fully take advantage of the program. For example, it is estimated that someone can "type" something approximately four times as quickly using voice commands than using the keyboard. Therefore, the individual who takes advantage of this alternative is using a potential obstacle, and instead of merely complaining about it, finds "another way" to function effectively.

In many areas of everyday life, we find tons of obstacles where we have choices - - either complain and be negative, or "think outside the box" and find a better way. Successful individuals do not give up, but rather find ways to get things done. Most things are possible if one thinks positively!

Today's Crazy Consumer Credit Rating System

Around 2008 - 2010, because of all the trouble and financial difficulties experienced by so many American financial institutions, especially banks, the Federal Government " bailed out" the banks, but created a completely different set of rules and restrictions that banks and lending institutions had to abide by. These rules attempted to control how banks charge interest on credit cards, while trying to free up monies by pumping dollars into the ailing system. Like many good intentions, especially when politicians tweak the plan to get it approved and then delay implementation, most credit card issuers had sufficient time to figure out how they could abide by the new restrictions that were supposed to protect consumers, while "ripping off" many consumers in other ways, to maximize their institutional profits. On the banking side, this has resulted in the elimination of certain fees that were previously charged, while making it back on other items. Some of these include record low interest paid on interest bearing accounts, while gradually and continuously moving interest rates charged on loans and credit cards up. In addition, most of the larger financial institutions, instead of using the influx of capital to free up loans, etc., which was the supposed intent, instead stiffened appraisal requirements on mortgages given, and demanded higher credit scores to qualify for the best rates, or in some cases, any loans at all. While there have been certain tweaks, our Credit Rating system is often quite misleading, and while certain things disproportionately might bring down one's credit number, others do not have as large an impact! Today, one needs a rating of approximately 750 or better, in many cases, to get the best rates, and in some cases, to even qualify for credit. That number is generally considered excellent, from about 660 - 750 is consider good (or OK), about 625 is satisfactory/ fair, and those with lower credit ratings often find it challenging to buy a car, qualify for any loan, etc.

In addition, while this was occurring, most of the credit card issuers took the opportunity to reduce many credit lines across the board. Since, in the complicated way that credit scores are calculated, a major factor is the ratio of credit card account balances in relationship to credit lines, with a lower percentage being preferable and securing a better score. Therefore, let's assume that an individual had five credit card accounts, each with, for example, a five thousand dollar line of credit ($5,000). That would mean that the total on these five accounts would be twenty five thousand dollars ($25,000). Hypothetically, let's assume that each account had one thousand dollars as a balance ($1,000) or a total of five thousand dollars ($5,000) balance. This would mean that the individual had used twenty percent (20%) of the available balance, an amount that would ordinarily be deemed as a good ratio, and would contribute to a better score. Now, let's assume that these five accounts all had there credit limits reduced in this across the board move to three thousand ($3,000), or now that the total credit limit would be fifteen thousand ($15,000) instead of the prior $25,000. Now, understand that since this was an across-the-board move, it was often unrelated to an individual's credit worthiness, but the ratio of credit used to credit limit would now be raised from 20% to 33.33%. Obviously, this higher ratio would have a detrimental impact on credit ratings, and in many cases, resulted in a reduction in an individual's credit score. Then, to further complicate the issue, many banks send out "lower interest rate" offers (for a limited time), which then entices someone to "borrow" more, which then triggers an even lower credit rating, and often then triggers a further reduction in one's credit limit, which then creates a "domino" effect, of further lowering one's credit rating.

Many individuals who pay their bills on time, and whose financial circumstances have not changed dramatically, have thus witnessed their credit ratings dropping during this period. To make matters worse, many banks then require higher than previous credit ratings to secure "best rate" loans. Obviously, what the politicians thought would help consumers, has in many ways had the opposite impact.

Why Selling & Marketing Is BOTH An Art and a Science?

 As I have trained many others in a variety of fields, including selling and marketing, training, management, leadership, negotiations, and many other areas since then, I have always incorporated the themes of everything in life being some sort of sales, and that effective selling is both an art and a science. With that in mind, an important caveat for those seeking either the best real estate or financial professional (or any other service - related pro) for THEM, experience is certainly important, but focus more on the individual's ideas, plans and willingness to customize the marketing/ sales/ planning approach to your personal needs, rather than merely proceeding in a one - size -fits - all way!
 
Why do I call selling both an art and a science? A science is something rather precise, and proper sales technique is extremely regimented. The best salespeople use the same proven technique each and every time they give a presentation. Of course, after a while, it seems like it is second nature to them, but it is still a very exact, precise, thought-out and proven methodology.

On the other hand, two individuals can follow the same basic "scientific" technique, and achieve vastly different results. That is why I am stating that selling is also an art. The most effective salespeople relate well to others, and understand human nature. Many of the top salesmen of all time have stated that selling is only a small percentage technical, while being predominantly understanding human nature.

The most effective salespeople are friendly, without being phony, and professional without being starchy and stuffy. Effective selling requires a sales person to do his homework to understand the needs of the individual he is selling to, and tailoring his presentation to address the other party's "hot button." The "hot button" is that set of circumstances, wording, and motivation that gets the other individual's attention, and motivates them to action.

Few people are actually born salespeople. While some people are more extroverted than others, and some feel more comfortable in a sales situation, these behaviors can be trained and made part of anyone desiring to become a more effective salesperson.

Motivated individuals learn the techniques, practice them, and make them part of their own persona. I have trained individuals who began as the shyest, least articulate and outgoing individuals, and developed them into professional, talented and successful sales professionals.

Once someone learns all the techniques, and then combines those "sciences" with the "art" of understanding human nature, he can and will be an elite sales professional. That is, as long as he does it every day!

Main Components of a Quality Business Plan

One of the major challenges facing any entrepreneur is understanding all the various nuances involved in preparing to, and actually opening a new business. In discussions with many graduating college students, as well as many professionals (physicians, dentists, etc.), I have often been told that while the individual feels completely (or mostly) prepared with the "academic" and technical subject matter, they feel inadequate when it comes to the business aspects themselves. One of the major omissions seems to be a lack of familiarity with the basic components of a business plan, and how to use these. Consider also, the need for this skill and mindset, as it relates to performing as a successful independent contractor, such as a real estate or financial planning professional. How well each individual is organized and/ or prepared, often determines the ultimate success, and this is important, not only to the realtor or financial planner, but also to their potential client, etc.
 
1. The first question one must ask, before even beginning to create a business plan, is what is the owner's "vision" for the business (or practice). What does the individual want from his business that might differentiate it from the "pack?"

2. One of the most challenging items to many novices seems to be the ability to identify costs, particularly startup costs and reserves. What if the business takes longer to open than anticipated (for example, awaiting permits, licenses, etc)? What if the revenue flow is lower than expectations? One of the biggest identifiable errors, and the overwhelmingly biggest cause for the demise of new businesses, is being under- capitalized. Businesses with insufficient reserves cannot pursue many effective strategies, and often resort to disastrous or at least disadvantageous crisis management instead of forward looking planning. Those involved in commissions - based industries or endeavors, must factor in how long things take to close, and be prepared for the early, lower cash flow phases of any business.

3. Part of a business plan must include in- depth financials. This information must include forecasts for revenues (which should be done with at least three different scenarios; optimum, average, and below average. The listing and analysis for revenue must include a discussion of why these revenues are anticipated, and how these numbers are devised. Next, a complete list of expenditures must be included. These expenditures must include start- up costs (including renovations, equipment, tools, labor, licenses, inspections, etc.), an in- depth marketing plan including a timetable and all expenditures related, fixed expenses such as rent, taxes, fees, salaries, benefits, shipping (if applicable), etc. Start- up business plans should include a starting take home salary for the owner, because if the owner is not compensated from the onset, many delay taking a salary (which causes undue stress and pressure, often creating burnout scenario).

4. A thorough, comprehensive marketing plan, with particular emphasis on the first three months, six months and one year must be developed as part of this plan. These expenses must be planned for and considered part of the start up plan, at least for this preliminary period. Many businesses make the mistake of saying they will market, but because they are under- capitalized, fail to expend sufficient funds to this endeavor. Invariably, if there is any type of financial shortfall, the marketing is often the victim, which then also adversely impacts revenues, etc. Abandoning marketing is generally short- sighted. So is over - advertising or entirely focusing on one type of vehicle (for example, while Social Media is important/ essential, it must not be the sole way one markets).

In over three decades of counseling start up businesses and practices, I have come to the conclusion that one of the major faults of many educational programs is not academic, but instead an insufficient emphasis on needed and necessary business basics. I urge colleges, universities, etc. to reconsider, and include more business related information, so that their students are better prepared for the real world.

How To Use Social Media to Enhance Your Personal Brand, Without Neglecting Other Necessities/ Approaches

Regardless of what type of work you might to, or what endeavor you participate in, anyone wishing to stand out from others in a significant and/ or meaningful manner, needs to point out to others the ways that distinguish himself from the crowd. It takes a combination of objective introspection combined with a commitment to contemplating why others would benefit by selecting you! The most effective and impactful individuals take these things into consideration: 1. What is your message, and what is the message you wish to give? Know your message and your desired niche; 2. Understanding how social media can be effectively used in combination with other methods; and, 3. Realize that different generations analyze matters, communicate and operate differently, and that there are significant differences in many cases between those belonging to the Baby Boomers, Gen - X, and Mellenials Generations.

1. Social media can either be an effective and important component of marketing and branding yourself, or it can be all - encompassing and utilize far too much of your time and energies. The first step must be analyzing, identifying and determining precisely what message you wish to transmit, and how each component should become a portion of creating and enhancing your personal brand. What differentiates you? Why should others select you and decide to choose you to do business or have relations with? Think about this question, and break down your message to the length of an elevator speech, by fully yet succinctly motivating others to care about your message and methodologies, as well as your unique approach!

2. Using social media does not, and must not, mean abandoning other more conventional means of communication. Social media is always more effective and meaningful when a well considered strategy is used that synergistically links the social media message to the message transmitted via other media, including printed and oral/ verbal communication.

3. It is important to understand and distinguish the generations known as Baby Boomers, Gen - X, and Mellenials. Baby Boomers are those born between 1945 and 1960, Gen - X between 1961 and 1980, and the Mellenials between 1981 and 2000. While these ranges are absolute, because of environmental, social and experience differences, the reality is that different age groups often process information differently, as well as have differing comfort zones. Baby Boomers, while often adapting to technology, still often prefer telephone and face - to - face communication as their primary or go - to method. They often seek to develop relationships, as well as to be somewhat social justice - oriented, while generally believing in the need for mutual respect and courtesy (such as responding to questions and communications, committing to appointments and being on time, etc. Gen - Xers often tend to be more concerned about themselves and their immediate social group, often preferring less personal forms of communicating, and use texts more than they like phone calls. Their exposure differed significantly from either of the other two generations in many areas. Mellenials never experienced a time when there was no color television, personal computers, video games, air conditioning, etc. Many believe this generation is often the most narcissistic of the three, and tend to prefer to digest things in capsule form rather than in depth, often seeming to believe that there is no necessity to reply, unless it is personally essential to them.

Only when we adapt our message to the needs of all three of these generations do we fully brand ourselves in a significant manner. Social media, used to its fullest and correctly, can significantly and positively effect this process. However, the caveat must be to enhance your Social Media presence and performance, but maintain your traditional approaches, including other media, traditional mail, and face - to - face, etc.

The LURES Of Negotiating

One of the most important skills each of us need to develop and enhance is to become a truly effective negotiator. In nearly every aspect of our lives, business, personal, organization, etc., we very often discover ourselves in a situation that rerquires negotiating skills. Since there are very few, if any, scenarios when there is total and complete agreement, we end up in some sort of negotiations if we wish to get things accomplished. Imagine family situations, especially either between siblings, between spouses, or between parent and children, and think about how often there is a need to negotiate? Most businesses need to make certain choices and/ or decisions on a daily basis, if they are to progress in a meaningful basis. Perhaps one of the biggest stumbling blocks that occur in politics is that there are a dearth of political leaders that are effective negotiators. Perhaps the single most essential asset needed to be a great real estate professional, is the willingness and ability to be the best possible negotiator, understanding clearly what is needed, and created a perceived win - win scenario, etc., by all involved in the transaction. Those desirous of becoming effective and meaningful negotiators should prioritize the LURE of negotiating: listen; understand; repeat; empathize; and seize control of the situation.

1. It all begins with being an effective listener. This means that you not only pay attention and hear what others say, but commit to acquiring all necessary facts and information that will make you have more clarity.

2. While listening is an essential first step, unless it is followed by understanding what is both being said, and what is left unsaid, there is little opportunity to communicate in a manner that accomplishes one's goals and aspirations. This requires follow up questions that probe as deeply as possible, so as to realize the nuances and meanings that the other person is implying.

3. Once one feels that he has a clearer understanding of the needs, wants and position of the other person, there is a need to repeat what one believes is being said, doing so in the form of a question, in order to get agreement as to what needs to be discussed, and the issues involved.

4. While the first three steps are quite important, perhaps the most essential component and often overlooked one, is being empathetic. An individual must be empathetic without appearing sympathetic. Empathy may simply be considered as putting yourself in the other person's place (so as to better understand both how they feel and the needs), while sympathy is merely feeling sorry for someone (which may be appropriate in short doses in certain scenarios, but almost never in negotiating situations).

5. All of these preliminary steps need to culminate in a position where an effective negotiator is able to seize control of the situation. It is important to understand, however, that gaining control is far different than trying to negate the other party's needs. Rather, when you are able to maintain control, you can move the negotiation forward in progressive manner, striving for the goal of win - win results.

Since negotiating skills are so important, doesn't it make sense for each of us to become better at them? Therefore, doesn't it make sense to proceed in an orderly and organized manner, effectively using these five steps?

Are Your Goals & Dreams, YOUR GOALS & DREAMS?

You can't be true to yourself by trying to live someone else's dreams, or have someone else's goals! How much time and effort do you spend on you? What is really important to you, and why? Don't immediately respond in generalities, but rather make those goals and dreams specific, essential, personal and truly meaningful! What does success mean to you, and why? What are you committed to do in order to achieve to your potential? Unless your goals and dreams are personally meaningful, they will not inspire you or motivate you to persevere, persist and focus on your needs? Do you really believe in your goals, and how would achieving them serve to make your life better, more meaningful, or create a significant and essential difference? In any endeavor, in any business setting, one must seek his own personal Nirvana? For example, every professional Real Estate Agent, must make his or her own decisions as to his code of ethics, priorities, and how to best serve his customers and clients. There is no one - size - fits - all approach, to what is most important and relevant to others. One must understand that goals and dreams only make a real difference when an individual feels strongly and deeply about them, and creates them personally, rather than merely adopting someone else's goals/ dreams and/ or priorities.
 
1. In the past three plus decades, I have presented personal development/ self growth seminars to thousands of individuals. One of the essential steps in evolving to create the best you, is to create and use affirmations in an impactful and personally meaningful manner. However, unless one is willing to personalize these affirmations, they do not accomplish what they will if they are personal in nature! This means that there is no place for generalities, popularity concerns. or cliches in developing one's affirmations. It is always more effective when each of our personal ten affirmations are indeed personal, as well as specific in nature! What is an affirmation? At their best, they are stated only in the present tense and are in every day areas that we feel we can be better in, or do better at! For example, if one realizes he needs to lose weight, instead of saying, "I want to lose weight," or even "I will lose weight," the impactful way must be stated in the present, for example, by saying, "I live each day in a healthy manner, carefully selecting what I eat, and enjoy how it makes me look and feel."

2. Far too often, we resort to cliche or "safe" goals and dreams. These are almost always far too general in nature, and do not end up providing the needed call to action that personal dreams lead us to. Some cliche/ generalized dreams/ goals include: making more money (or even using a specific dollar amount); winning a race/ contest/ endeavor; selling more; being happy, etc. Corresponding and preferred personalized dreams would rather be: affording a four bedroom, three bath home in a specific location; creating value for others by achieving what needs to be done, and not merely accepting the status quo; becoming a better salesperson, learning the best techniques, and using them so I can achieve my personal goals; carefully defining what happiness means to you!

Make your affirmations personal and specific. Create a personal Affirmation List, include ten specific items, and read them to yourself, in a private setting, at least three times each and every day. When our dreams and goals align precisely with your affirmations in a personally meaningful manner, then they will motivate you to be the best you can be!

Strategic Planning - Usage and Importance

Like many activities and projects, many organizations enter into strategic planning in a very limited way. They often treat the process in much the same manner as they often treat the budget process- that is, as an exercise rather than a potentially extremely effective tool. In more than three decades, I have successfully guided numerous organizations through the vital intricacies of the process, and have also witnessed many organizations that simply went through the motions of strategic planning, often merely to be able to say they did so. Properly done, and performed at consistent regular periods, effective strategic planning can often be a major factor and difference between a stagnant and a successful evolving organization. This is not only true as it relates to organizations, but applies to many aspects of our personal lives. If you want to sell or buy a home, what is your plan? What do you want/ need to achieve and what are your top priorities? When you discuss your finances with an adviser, do you discuss overall strategy, with an emphasis on the goals?
 
We can understand much about strategic planning from sports analogies. Yogi Berra said, "If you don't know where you are going, you are certain to end up somewhere else." While we often laugh at many of what are commonly referred to as "Yogi-isms," this statement points to the need to put down on paper clear cut objectives, and for leaders to have a meaningful vision. By doing this, an organization knows what it wants to accomplish, which is practically speaking, the first step to getting there. Therefore, an organization should break up the strategic planning process into stages. Remember that everything that applies to organizations also applies to your personal approach!
 
1. The first stage is identifying where an organization (or you are) is, in terms of strengths, weaknesses, goals and objectives.

2. The next step is to clearly examine the existing Mission Statement of the organization, and see if and how it might need to be tweaked (or what your own mission might be)

3. Then, each aspect of the organization must be looked at, including governance, financial/ fiscal, membership, mission, successes and weaknesses, training programs, leadership/ leadership training, staffing needs, programming and events, priorities, etc. (In your own life, how to your financial and personal planning seek an overall goal?)

4. Finally, the strategic plan must morph into a viable action plan, including all relevant time lines, priorities, responsibilities, reviews, and evaluations.

5. Finally, a schedule must be decided upon, where the strategic plan is reviewed, updated and upgraded, if necessary.

The great hockey star, Wayne Gretzky is famous for saying, "I always skate to where I think the puck is going to be." Similarly, organizations (and each of us) must be willing to continuously take their pulse to see both where they are and where they are going to be. This requires an emphasis on having a clear vision for the organization (or yourself), and understanding the significance of continuously evolving an organization to better meet the needs and requirements of its membership. It is not enough to merely talk about strategic planning, but rather there is a clear need to always work to assure that an organization maximizes its potential, and enhances the membership experience.

Is Business Ethics an Oxymoron??

We often read and hear references to business ethics. Undergraduate and post graduate courses dedicate large amounts of time and resources to the topic. However, if one were to ask the average consumer if he believed that most businesses were conducted in an ethical manner, we would predominately receive negative responses. Simply stated, ethics can be defined as doing the right thing, the moral thing, and treating others with honor and respect. Related to business, this concept would include several items, and when we evaluate how most businesses conducted business, we would often avoid referring to these practices as moral. Whether this is about a large business or a service - oriented business, representative or agent, shouldn't every customer/ consumer be entitled to honest, ethical treatment? If you are buying or selling your home, you deserve this type of honorable treatment, and the industry has a Code of Ethics, yet many who have been involved in this process, complain of lack of transparency, honor or ethics by certain agents. This also often occurs when people are asked about the behavior of their Financial Adviser. 

1. One of the necessities of being ethical is telling the truth. However, when we look at how businesses, services and products are often promoted, the truth is stretched rather thin. One example, of course is the mobile communications or cell phone industry. Each carrier runs ads trying to convince us how superior they are. However, since there are no legal requirements even for using terminology such as "4G," and each carrier handles their lines differently, there is often quite a bit of variation. For example, going strictly by its ads, one would believe that Verizon cellular service is nearly perfect. Its advertisements makes claims about the clarity of its calls, how few calls are dropped, its speed, etc. While that is the case in some areas, several of my friends on Verizon service experience dropped calls, etc., in various areas, while having excellent service in others. AT&T Mobility claims its system is fastest, and in some areas it is. I use the system and have had wonderful experience, yet, I know others who have been extremely disappointed. Sprint customers have similar experiences, and I have had wonderful experience with Sprint's Air Card, which works well nearly everywhere I've used it. However, as good as it is, it is certainly not as quick as wired or WiFi service. Every other service has its proponents, as well as its attackers. The issue is not which service is the best, but rather how the services promote themselves. While effective advertising is self - promotional by definition, misleading ads are certainly not terribly ethical.

2. Have you ever gone into a store and purchased something, and the store quickly asks you if you'd like to purchase an Extended Warranty. While there is nothing wrong with offering this, nor with the stores making additional revenues doing so, have you ever been given a clear cut explanation of what is and is not covered, and the limitations. Remember, we are discussing ethics here!

3. Investment Advisers are another area of ethical concern. Is the individual an unbiased adviser, or is he simply a salesman disguising himself as an adviser? Both duties and functions are acceptable, but which is ethical?

4. In Real Estate, does the average buyer truly understand the difference between being represented by a Buyers Agent, a Brokers Agent, and a Sellers Agent? In New York State, for example, by law, prospective buyers must be given an Agency Agreement that explains each of these. Yet, if the average buyer truly understood the differences, one would think the vast majority would prefer using a Buyers Agent, whose loyalty is directly to the buyer. Is this an ethical dilemma?

There are so many situations in business where there is the opportunity for a business, product, or representative to opt to either prioritize ethical behavior, or to merely do what might be expedient and in the store (or business, product, or reps) best interest, rather than the customer (or buyer). Therefore, one must wonder if business ethics is another  oxymoron, such as military intelligence, moral politician, etc.

Why Quality Negotiating Is Both An ART & A SCIENCE?

Have you ever thought about how many aspects of life are related to, or involve negotiating? Isn't it a fact that nearly everything we do ends up more successfully if we are capable negotiators? However, despite the fact that it is so important, whether we are involved in selling, leadership, contracts, any business aspect, as well as in our day - to - day interpersonal dealings, very few individuals ever fully explore the needs, requirements, components, techniques, or nuances that are so relevant. Those considering selling or buying a home, and determining who to hire to represent them as their agent, should interview potential people to understand their negotiating philosophy and/ or approach, because this is invariably an essential component in the most effective real estate representation. Unlike many other techniques, effective negotiations must be understood as both an ART, as well as a SCIENCE!

1. The A, R and T of ART should help propel us towards creating the best opportunity for success. Of course, it begins with the right attitude, which must be positive, proactive, and one that willingly cooperates. When this becomes the opening mindset, the negotiations are approached to bring forth a win - win scenario, rather than an adversarial beat you opponent one!

2. Never go into a negotiation unless you do so by seeing reality the way it is, rather than merely the way you might wish it to be! This requires a commitment and search for actually understanding needs and nuances, and going forth with an open mind, rather than prejudging.

3. No negotiation, no matter how well trained or qualified the negotiator may be, will bring forth the results you desire unless you understand that there must be mutual trust between negotiating parties. However, one can't just hope for, expect or ask for this type of trust, but rather must earn it, by a combination of his actions, empathy, and commitment to absolute integrity.

4. As essential as the ART is to this activity, it must also be understood that there is also a SCIENCE involved. This must always begin by focusing on your search for agreement. How can this go anywhere meaningful unless both sides commit to, and seek agreement/ meeting of the minds?

5. It is important to aim towards some degree of common ground, where neither side feels he is merely winning or losing.

6. While you can use all your efforts and best intentions towards achieving these necessities, one can never control what others do or how they may behave. Therefore, it is important to proceed with ingenuity and absolute integrity.

7. Listen effectively, and view needs from the eyes of the other party. Only when there is a focus on empathy can progress be made the way you desire.

8. Remember that things are rarely simply black and white! Effective negotiating requires mastering the various nuances.

9. You must have a certain degree of clarity and consideration, if you want to end up with a contract where both sides feel resulted in a fair and reasonable manner.

10. Is your energy level maintained at a the highest possible level, in a positive, meaningful and significant manner? Lethargy and negativity are generally the cancers to successful negotiations!

The better you understand what negotiating involves, the more effective one will be. The combination of a variety of skills, perceptions and attitudes, used in a synergistic manner, will usually get you to the point you wish to be.

Economic News: The Hype, The Reality, and How Our Perspective Skews the Facts

No wonder most people don't understand the economy! Often what might seem good on one hand, has bad side effects on the other. For example, the stock market rises- one would think that was good! But that was mostly due to the rising price of oil- bad news. But, often the price of oil rises because the "experts" believe the economy is improving and thus more oil will be needed in production- good news! But that rise in oil prices causes the cost of living to increase- bad news. But that helps the Gross Domestic Product (GDP)- good news! But that then causes inflation- bad news. But that inflation means the economy is improving- good news! But then the Fed becomes concerned about inflation and raises interest rates- bad news! Which causes the value of the dollar to improve- good news! But that hurts exports because now American products cost more overseas- bad news! But that means foreign products cost less in the US- good news! But that hurts American companies competitiveness- bad news! We read or hear about real estate news, including sales data, trends, new builds, etc. Yet, how these things are measured often skews our views, and then if enough people become influenced by a particular article, report or point of view, many people begin to behave in some specific manner! Is it good or bad that oil prices are now their lowest in years? If you use oil to heat your home, or if you drive a car, it should be good news, but then some economic report tells us how bad or dangerous an indicator it may be! Low interest rates translate to lower mortgage rates, but it also means lower interest paid by banks on our deposits. If you're retired and on a fixed income, interest rates have a different meaning and significance, perhaps, than it does to younger individuals.
 
If we think that political analysis and political chatter is often more hype than anything else, the same can certainly be said about analyzing economic news! You can readily see why economic news often seems co confusing. Economic news often seems confusing because it is - - what is good for one consumer, might be bad for another- what is good for one company, bad for another- what might be good for one sector of economy- bad for others.

The stock market is often the most confusing. On days when there is "bad news," the market often goes up, while on some "good news" days, the market sometimes goes down! While the Dow, or the S&P, etc., might go up, it does not mean that the stock(s) you own, will follow suit. Nearly every day, the media reports that a company's financial results either exceeded or failed to meet expectations. Shouldn't that say something to us about expectations and forecasts done by the so - called professionals?

Too often, for the sake of a sound-byte, the media tries to over-simplify economic news. Yet the economy is by definition quite complex. The one issue there should be some agreement on is that high unemployment is not good. Even in this area, should we look at official unemployment rates, under - employment, or the number of people who have given up, and no longer are seeking jobs? Yet even in that case, the "experts" can't agree upon, nor act upon a viable solution.

The best way to think about the economy is this-- the difference between a recession and a depression is that it's a recession when it happens to someone else-- it's a depression when it happens to you!

It is my belief that a healthy economy requires certain factors to be in place - - low joblessness; high consumer confidence; a strong manufacturing sector; and reduced government deficits. That is what we must demand!

Motivated by Fears or PURPOSE?

Individual and distinctive features and factors often impact what inevitably motivates us, either to take action or to procrastinate. In addition, our personal preferences, situations, and mindset often lead us to view things in a specific manner, which often will dictate how we proceed, etc. Which motivates you the most often and strongly: your fears, or your PURPOSE? The essential reality for most of us is that we can either choose to propel ourselves forward in a synergistic manner that aligns with our purpose and motivations, or we can opt to become entrenched and entrapped by our self - limiting and inhibiting fears. Only when our quest for meaningfulness outdoes our restrictive comfort zone, do we become capable of achieving near our potential.

Consider this from the perspective of how our motivations impact some of our essential day - to - day, and/ or major considerations/ behaviors. One example is how either buyers or sellers behave and think, when they are going through the process. Is the buyer letting his fears, either financial, commitment, or inability to make a essential decision, or does his sense of purpose motivate him to pursue a better plan, and look at things more logically than emotionally?
 
1. Potential is the primary first component of this process. Few individuals achieve to the maximum they can, because they proceed through life in an apparent state of perpetual fear of failure!

2. It should never be considered sufficient for anyone to simply progress through their day to day lives, but rather they must feel an essential sense of usefulness in what they do, and aim for.

3. Is your plan one that combines being relevant with being realistic? Relevance without a realistic chance of achievement will achieve little of significance, and is often what those who stress rhetoric over achievement. Those combining both components maintain the ability to move forward, because they feel better about themselves!

4. Is your course of action well - meaning but rather haphazard, or is it rather plan - directed in a manner that creates meaningful priorities that enhance one's focus and opportunities for achievement?

5. Analyzing alternatives in an objective manner positons us best to understand and evaluate the most essential options that will determine whether we take advantage of the various opportunities that cross our path on a nearly daily basis! Proceeding in the manner that best addresses needs and objectives is consistently the best course.

6. Evaluate and understand your personal strengths and weaknesses, and use what your capabilities are to their best avail, while simultaneously addressing areas that could use some improvement. This should aim in a direction where we set our sights towards something meaningful.

7. Do you only consider yourself, or are you willing to view things from the perspectives of others (are you empathetic)? This requires commitment to genuine introspective, objective self - examination. 

Consider what makes you tick before you look elsewhere! Don't let the easier course of following your fears prevail! Are you focused on the fear of failure, fear of success, or motivated by a constructive sense of  PURPOSE?