Are You A REAL Leader?

How does one become a REAL leader, rather than merely, another, of the rest - of - the - pack? Why does this matter, and how does it impact, the group, one represents, and the stakeholders, he serves? While there are many factors, and some, must be somewhat, customized, based on the individual, there are certain necessities, in order to be elevated, into this rare, lofty position, etc! With that in mind, this article will attempt to briefly consider, review and discuss, using the mnemonic approach, some of these characteristics, and necessities, of being capable, of making a true difference, for the better, rather than merely holding some position of leadership.

1. Rational; realistic; reasoning; relevant: While lofty goals, and pursing as many viable options and alternatives, is important, nothing positive can occur, unless a leader, exhibits the utmost degree of rational thought, and development. He must be realistic, while pursuing options and alternatives, and seeking better! One's reasoning must be relevant, or why would others become willing to listen, and buy - into his ideas, plans, and potential solutions?

2. Empathy; excellence; emphasis; endurance; evolving: Either groups are consistently, evolving, or they will fail, to be sustainable! However, no one has all the answers, or even all the questions, and therefore, it's important to emphasize effective listening, over talking, and commit to learning from every conversation and experience. One's goal must be the utmost degree and possibility of his personal excellence, rather than settling for good - enough! This must direct his emphasis, and focus, and he must exhibit a significant degree of endurance, in order to possess the necessary persistence, to implement meaningful changes!

3. Attitude; attention; aptitude; articulate: Real leaders possess a genuine, positive, can - do, attitude, and are willing to pay keen attention, to both, relevant needs, and sustainable ramifications, etc! When they also commit to developing the quality aptitude, and relevant skill - set, and articulate an inspiring, motivating message, which connects with their stakeholders (actual and potential), they become positioned, to be real leaders!

4. Listen; learn; leadership: Perhaps, more than any other single asset, a real leader must be an effective and willing listener, and commit to constantly, learn, and become the best, he can be! When he exhibits true leadership skills, based on the best interests of the organization, and constituents, he proceeds, with the potential to become a real leader!

Do you have, what it takes, to be a REAL leader? Do you have the combination of attitude, aptitude, and persistence, to be, different from, the rest - of - the - pack?

Examine Elected Officials ACTIONS - Not Promises/ Rhetoric

All too often, voters have elected politicians, based on their promises, and rhetoric, and other, rather meaningless (in the bigger - picture) issues, rather than focusing on whether, they demonstrate a willingness, to create a well - considered, action plan, and strategy, to get things done, which might make a relevant, sustainable difference, for the better! It's not about what someone says, which should make a difference, but, rather, what he seeks to achieve, his motivations (is it about the politician's personal/ political agenda, and/ or self - interest), and whether he has the experience, knowledge, judgment, and other necessities, to lead effectively. We must look at the overall quality and relevance of one's ACTIONS, rather than promises, and rhetoric! With that in mind, this article will attempt to briefly examine, consider, review, and discuss, using the mnemonic approach, some of the elements and necessities of leading, for all the people.

1. Attention; attitude; aptitude; articulate: Shouldn't a public official's focus, and attention, be on serving all the people? In November, 2016, the United States elected Donald Trump, to become the 45th President of this nation. Does his attitude, which seems to be focused, on his core supporters, and excluding many others, seem to be, in the best interests of the people? Unlike his predecessors, Mr. Trump, had no previous public service, and, many of his backers, seemed to pay little attention, on whether he had the aptitude, judgment, experience, and expertise, to proceed, wisely, and in a relevant, sustainable way. This President, certainly articulates his message (although, often in a conflicting way), but is that message, focused on the common good?

2. Creative; cooperative; character: Rather than seeking to Make America Great Again, wouldn't we all, be better served, if there was creative leadership, focused on the best way to make America, maintain its focus and emphasis, into the future? We need leaders, who focus on the cooperative approach, rather than a polarizing one! We should expect elected officials, to exhibit the quality character, to focus on what's best, for those he serves, rather than any personal/ political agenda, and/ or, self - interest!

3. Timely: Rather than fixating on the past, because everything looks better, in black - and - white, we should elect individuals, willing to fully consider options and alternatives, and, consistently, produce timely action!

4. Intentions; imagination; integrity; ideas; ideology: When voting, consider a candidate's intentions, and whether he possesses, both a well - developed, relevant imagination, as well as absolute integrity, based on the ideology, framed by our Constitution, of this nation!

5. Open - minded; options; opportunities: Avoid electing people, with the, My way or the highway, mindsets, and are ready, willing and able, to proceed, with an open - mind, and a willingness to consider the options and alternatives, and be prepared to take advantage of the finest opportunities!

6. Needs: Whose needs, does the particular leader, prioritize - his own, or those he serves and represents? Opt for someone, who puts the needs of the nation, ahead of any personal/ political agenda, and/ or, self - interest!

7. Service; system; sustainable solutions: The priority of anyone elected, should be, quality service, to both, his constituents (all of them), as well as his nation! He must perceive and conceive of, create, develop, and implement, the best system, to achieve, relevant, sustainable solutions! 

Wake up. America, and assume your personal responsibility, for voting, and doing so, wisely! Don't blame others, but proceed, with judgment, rather than apathy!

Winners Never Give Up

From time to time, every individual experiences situations that often create self doubt, and certain other negative emotions. Few people can honestly say that they have never been confronted by a situation or a circumstance that seemed unwielding, and so daunting that they did not consider simply "throwing in the towel."

However, what differentiates most truly successful individuals is that they possess a winning attitude. This is an attitude that states that one determines ones own fate by how we react to what life deals us. The adage, "If life hands you lemons, make lemonade," is certainly an important concept that often differentiates the most successful from the less successful individual.

Most of us have read that Abraham Lincoln lost repeated elections before he was elected President. He lost a state election, a Congressional election, a Senate election, etc., before finally being victorious in his election for President in 1860. Lesser people than Lincoln might certainly have given up prior to that.

President Franklin Delano Roosevelt did not permit his deteriorating health, or a crumbling economy stop him from taking the bold steps he felt necessary to do the best that he can. Yet, I often speak to people who have lost jobs, often due to no fault of their own, who spend more time complaining and commiserating than they do taking the necessary actions to move ahead with their lives.

I have counseled individuals who ruined their credit and finance, as well as often their family lives, due to a gambling problem. Rather than address the issue, and take whatever necessary steps, even if somewhat uncomfortable to help themselves, state that they enjoy gambling too much to give it up. One must understand that it is almost always impossible to help anyone that does not recognize and admit their own issues, and who wants help.

We can be supportive and helpful to individuals with habits, addictions, dependencies, reliances, or near-addictions, but we must realize that there is a very fine line between supportive and enabling.

I believe that the best thing we can do for others is help them to develop that winning attitude, which includes an unwillingness to give up. If someone gives up, or is unwilling to seek help or counsel, and merely blames others or makes excuses, they will almost never have a winning life.

You Can't Just Wish - You Have To Do

There is certainly nothing wrong with wishful thinking, unless there is no action taken to help bring that wish to fruition. Rarely, does a wish become a reality without the aid of hard work, a plan, and action.

How often do we hear someone say that they are just unlucky, or that they don't get any breaks. The sad reality is, that with very few exceptions, we make our own breaks in life. Disney may have a popular song lyric as its slogan, "When you wish upon a star," but for most it requires more than merely wishing.

Wishing is often an important step, however, in creating and developing positive thoughts, and a positive mind set. Positive mental attitudes, positive imaging and a can-do attitude are important steps in any type of success. They lead someone to feeling good about themselves, and believing that something is doable. Anyone who believes he will fail, always will fail, and thus belief in self is essential.

On the other hand, however, merely wishing is not enough. Individuals must create plans of action (or action plans) and determine specifically how they will accomplish their goals. It requires first setting the goal, determining the viability and need for the plan or action, and then to develop specific steps that need to be taken. Individuals developing a plan must consider numerous viable alternatives, examine the pros and cons, and potential ramifications, as well as how "badly" the individual wants his wish.

Is it just a wish, or is it truly an important need and/ or desire? What is the individual willing to do to bring that wish to fruition?

Most wishes are achievable. However, they require effort, follow- through, and a realistic, actionable plan!

Attitudinal Adjustment

We have all listened to people who appear to almost enjoy telling us about "problems," and "if" they could do this or that, or that something is "impossible.," or that they'll "try." Unfortunately, these non- productive, types of negative words generally generate negative thinking, and dramatically hinder anyone's ability to achieve to one's potential.

When one thinks about anything as a "problem," it is an unpleasant thought, bringing forth visions of misery, failure, disappointment, disillusionment, etc. It generates anxiety and stress, and is generally counter-productive in terms of enthusiasm, spirit, etc. However, if instead of thinking about a "problem," one thinks about a "challenge," and eliminates the word "problem" from one's vocabulary, replacing it with words like "challenge," "obstacle," etc., there is a much more positive approach capable of utilization. When one thinks of a "challenge," one thinks about a productive, do-able exercise, rather than an impossibility. Once one stops visualizing failure, the chances of success and true achievements are dramatically enhanced. Often, when I have given motivational and/ or sales training seminars, I begin by having participants, in large block letters, write on a piece of paper, "P-R-O-B-L-E-M," and then have them tear that paper into "a million pieces." I then have them think about the images conjured up by a problem versus those when one thinks of a challenge. While a challenge can be fun, and achievement and success can be visualized, that is not the case when one thinks of a problem! I then "forbid" the use of the word "problem," in my presence!

Think about someone who tells you that "they'll try" to do something. Rarely is anything productively done by that individual. Instead, surround yourself with people who will rather than with those that "try."

Remember that nothing that anyone else can achieve is "impossible." Something may require effort, "thinking outside the box," "challenging" oneself to do better and more, using a different approach, etc., but it is not impossible. Eliminate these types of negative words and this type of "stinkin' thinkin'." I welcome you to read my Associated Content article on stinkin' thinkin.'

Those that are the most productive and generally the most successful, and get results, have, for the most part, eliminated negative words and ideas and thoughts from their mindset. I challenge you to stop using those negative words, and after a few weeks evaluate the difference in your performance, attitude, and actions, objectively. Remember that most people would rather be around someone who is positive than someone negative, because negative people bring you down. Make these small changes, and challenge yourself to be all that you might be. Those that do will see improvement while those that remain negative, will never achieve to their potential!

Winning Attitudes Are Essential

There has been so much written about the importance of thinking positively, and having a positive attitude. Thousands of people annually spend millions of dollars on courses, self-improvement books, tapes, etc., to find out more about how their attitude impacts their actions. However, while so many people read, listen to, and attend seminars about thkis topic, very few actually incorporate these teachings into their everyday routine and thought mechanisms.

Having a positive attitude should actually be referred to as having a winning attitude. This type of attitude propels an individual into being the best he can be, and performing to his highest expectations. A winner is always going to be a part of the solution, while others are often a major part of the problem. Winners, however do not perceive of problems, but rather see these obstacles as challenges to overcome.

Those with winning attitudes possess a "can-do" attitude, while others do not. One will never hear a winner say that he will try, but rather a winner will state that he will. Positive thinkers will think in terms of how to get a good idea accomplished, and what can be done to make it even better. On the other hand, negative people will enjoy their role as naysayers, always saying why something will not work, or what is wrong with the idea, without suggesting alternatives. Positive thinkers are not necessarily "pie-in-the-sky" individuals, but have a relentlessness to follow through on worthwhile endeavors or ideas.

A winner will be a leader, and take command of a situation. Others will sit in the background, often expecting credit for what others do. Losers generally are followers, and often do not know precisely what they are following.

Having a winning attitude means always being true to your own beliefs, and behaving in an ethical and moral manner. An individual with a positive attitude always works steadfastly to treat everyone fairly and honestly. Followers and naysayers often play the "blame game," rather than assuming personal responsibility, which an effective leader assumes.

Effective leadership requires using one's positive attitude productively to help, rather than harm, at all times. When someone actually is positive, rather than simply acting the part, he becomes a more productive and effective individual.

You Are What You Think!

Many years ago, I began my research into, which then created my strong belief in, the power of positive thinking. This motivational point of view has led me to advise businesses and organizations, train management, teach the art and science of marketing and sales, as well as embarking on a career giving seminars on motivational thinking topics. Before I was a believer, a speaker said that "You are what you think," and at the time, I kidded that I must therefore be either a woman or a sports hero, because that's what I predominantly thought about at the time.

However, there is no greater truism than the incredible power of the mind determing our actions and successes. When an individual does not believe in himself, almost invariable that person does not succeed. They often are so busy visualizing the reasons why they cannot do something that they often do not put forth enough effort to be successful. "Mind power" is not solely an expression, but the mind often determines one success or failure. I have witnessed innumerable examples of two equally talented, intelligent, and trained individuals, who end up with far different results in terms of success or failure. The vast majority of the time the successful person is the one that visualizes success and believes he can success, while the less successful individual foresees numerous "problems" and reasons why it can't be done.

It is important to understand that while some people always have reasons why it can't be done, others come up with ways to get it done. While positive individuals see obstacles, negative individuals see problems. Clearly, problems are not fun, and we often try to avoid problems, while obstacles bring an image of something that may be somewhat difficult, but can be done, and is a challenge (instead of a problem). Great golfers, for example, see difficult shots as challenging, and often make shots that we 'duffers" consider incredible! The rest of us "duffers" often see these difficult shots as impossible, and our results are generally also less than stellar.

Positive attitudes and motivations tend to create an individual who learns from both his strengths and weaknesses, addressing those weaknesses in a constructive manner, and utilizing the strengths to ones advantage. An individual's "self talk" can either be constructive or destructive, and the most successful individuals motivate themselves to believe they can achieve.

Our perceptions often lead us to conceive of something in a particular way. Once we believe and conceive in a positive manner, our probability of achievement is maximized. It is essential that each of us give ourselves the best opportunity to succeed.